Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize