went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Everclear isn't food dammit
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize