I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours