i jhust puked up my retainher.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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