let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
