At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
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It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
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Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I believe in your delicious
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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