Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
