i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
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