i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
