He is such a slut. More and more my type.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
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