We're facebook friends in real life
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
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