also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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