In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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