He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
