So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
