I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
