DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
