whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
