it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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