it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
