nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize