sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
