Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Randomize
