No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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