it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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