I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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