How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
