Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
