Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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