I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
