I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
