More tranny stories later!
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
