It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I could make wine with my vomit
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I want a musical about memes.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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