I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
