me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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