I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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