i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
