Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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