I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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