On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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