he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
