I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
