It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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