We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize