So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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