they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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