i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
