I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
