Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
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How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
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Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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