Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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