Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
