i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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